Always two steps behind, or way ahead! This is okay, there are no pace rules except the ones you create in your mind. It is certain that we need to let go of this rigidity that we create. Somehow we tend to allow others to dictate the how and why. There are real rules in life that we must play by, no give on those. Your play by play for yourself are yours alone. Get up early, sleep in. Stay up late, go to bed early. These are for you to decide, no judgement, it is of no ones concern. Why are we so moved by other’s opinions?
I woke up this am, all quiet in the house, I allowed myself to lounge in bed, planning, thinking, resting. It was after nine when I left my room, grabbed my phone, got my coffee and did nothing. Had a missed message, family was coming in for a visit. I did not panic, I did not clean, I did not get dressed. Had a three hour visit that was so relaxing. Conversations leading to laughter, catching up on all of this speedy life has to offer. It is mid afternoon and I have done nothing yet pertaining to my home. Just my own self love has been in the forefront today. Will this feel the same, when those desired retirement days come?
Am I lazy? Why would I even think that? What do we measure ourselves against? My family is cared for, that is first and it is done. Clean clothes to wear, food made most of our meals. I even have implemented a few new ones for this coming year that have been a big hit. I guess I am just calm and I am not used to it. Christmas comes in a big rush, it comes, ready or not. I like this part, this calm afterwards. I’m gonna grab a book and read it cover to cover. Do for yourself, just one day…you deserve it!
Momma Wouldn't Say 