You First

Self is selfish! I think it is necessary! We are constantly bending for everyone, not always reluctantly. Sometimes it is expected and even essential. We do because we are and that is okay, and it is okay to stop. I give you permission to allow yourself to take time for you. I know you don’t need permission but it may seem that you do. It shows mutual respect for others to have approval. You do what you want, and you should feel good about it, allies in your corner, nods of agreement! Being you, without having foreboding weighing on your mind. Doing something for yourself without looking over your own shoulder. Completely relax, knowing full peace!

It is not selfish, we would just go all the time, never seeking solace and reflection. I am not talking about chores, household duties, but being available to others. You know that most of us take on other peoples things, their lives can pull you in and that is great, but not a detriment to your own sanity. I am not asking you to turn your back on anyone, just step away for you, set aside time for just you. Give to yourself, putting yourself first. Maybe for some you read this and you are already there. That is fantastic, I feel that too. I also remember the days when the kids were little and consumed all of me, they stole my space, my intimacy, my toilet and shower time. I welcomed it! I also miss it, as much as they seem to rob your sleep and your ability to eat on your own or even complete a meal.

Now this chapter of me, has me out front. I have time and I see you, and I hear you. All of the things we deal with are going to be there, they will wait or someone else will intercede for you. Do you think if you were to pass away tomorrow everything you are responsible for would also perish? I assure you not. The responsibilities you carry around would be transferred elsewhere. You need to train your replacements, think about that. If they can’t find something without you, if they are so completely dependent on you, what happens when you are not there? What happens? That is what you are setting them up for, coping, survival, self pacifying, most important they need to see that you look after you, they need to learn that too! We leave an impression on everyone we come in contact with. If we are lucky perhaps we give them tools to enhance their life. A good tool is to make yourself a priority, without guilt, without anyone making you feel selfish. Always love and love yourself first!