Dynamics

I was stuck in a drive thru this past weekend. I went for someone else, so I was obligated to a forty five minute wait. I had a chance to observe a family obviously traveling from another province. The SUV was packed from top to bottom. They had three children surely under the age of eight. Momma had her hands full with the youngest and acquiring all the items needed for their pit stop and dad…. well was doing dad things. The oldest took on the role of caregiver to the middle child, Mr. Middle was a toddler. Clearly the age of understanding but doing as he pleased. This was a parking lot and the oldest was doing his best. Mr. Middle did not want to rejoin the family and his brother had squatted down to lay out the plan. At one point he looked towards mom for guidance, she clearly had her hands full. With a bit of tugging, he was able to get his brother to his feet and coax him to the car without much force, he even maneuvered him into a car seat.

I was impressed, and relieved. After being relieved of his duties,the oldest, simply turned back into the child he should be. I reflected on my own family during the rest of my wait. My oldest adoring her sister and then the two of them fiercely protecting their brother. They would override me in situations they felt were unsafe, they taught, they helped, they loved. Not saying this was always the way, there definitely was some pummelling going on over the years too. Siblings are extra arms. My oldest was my right arm for a very long time. I recognize that and am thankful. We don’t just raise our children, they raise us as well.

Families are a unit, a force to be reckoned with. All of it, the fighting, arguing is necessary but the pay off. Someone in your corner hopefully for life. Ones that will remember with you the moments after parents are gone. One that can call you out, insult you, but defend you at any given moment. They can call you anything, but nobody else can. As a parent that is our hope, that this unit is indestructible and will be a forever bond. Sure time and distance changes things, but in a crunch, they will have each other. When you don’t have a big family, the memories end with you. After matriarchs and patriarchs in family is gone, there is a loss. Hold on to ones that love you!