Why are you doing it? Some people just jump on the hamster wheel of life. Bill’s need to be paid, and they just attach themselves to something to do to earn. Labour for the almighty dollar. If money is the goal, you might be on wrong path. It is obvious we have responsibilities, and goals. What if money was out of the equation? I have never even thought of it! My kids were talking about it. A cashless society, not the swipe path they are leaning towards, but the elimination of money altogether.

Think about it, if we went back to the day of practicing our strengths. Created wares for sale, bartered for our skills. Ebb and flow, tit for tat, reap what you sow. Equalization of sorts, not a money orientated society! Live off what you have , back to basics, bare bones. Elimination of greed. Sounds like some would still be left behind, but I think a more even playing field. Privileged and the grotesque greed that fuels so many stomping through the common folk as they go. Could it be controlled?

Money can be a detriment to society. If you could follow your heart, creating for yourself, days doing what you want. How would that work for mental health? No pressure to do something of societies value! Just working for your own pleasure. When you want, not the parameters of a nine to five, five days a week. Maybe today it’s just the morning. Maybe you are just doing things for you today. I am so inside the box sometimes, that I didn’t even consider this outside the box idea. Someone else’s strength, and we need that! I’ll swap for that!

Imagine if things lasted forever. It seemed like there was a time that manufacturers strived to create products that lasted. There were labels and brands that you could bank on, you didn’t have to replace items, you did because they bored you. That answers the question. We would be bored, find fault, and still be unhappy. New things do not make us happy. For a time they do, until we get bored. This is why the dumps are overflowing. As a nation we really need to reduce, reuse and recycle. People barely take free items now! I did a purge over a years time. Selling items, offering to family, paying forward, donating. It was not easy! Some places have restrictions, not taking glassware or books. I would offer stuff for free and nobody wanted my stuff, that one hurt! I could sell stupid stuff real easy, but things of value, people want to debate price, pick up end of the month or offer a story to try to have it for nothing. It’s quite comical really. Nobody likes wood anymore, well not wood coloured wood!

There a lot of minimalist type shows and information going on and I could get behind that nowadays! Not when I had kids, you just keep passing along things for years! The concept of everything in your home being used or useful sounds pretty relaxing. You look around your home and everywhere your eyes land is something meaningful to you. That may be my path for this year. I like that, I have whittled down my overall belongings, now to keep just what I personally am connected to. Sometimes I feel a bit like a storage locker after 32 years in the same house. These spaces are mine and I would like them to reflect that. That way if I do downsize it is just low key and my kids aren’t left with all the stuff. Rainy day stuff, might need stuff, gonna use it up stuff, forgot it was there stuff! When I pick up an item, I want it to be specific, not the ghost of an idea.

I look around and I see the trouble spots right now. I can not be accountable for all of them. I just changed my mindset and I am on a mission. It’s not the same as my previous purge, it is a preservation of mine! Spring cleaning is gonna be intense this year!

Shed the layers, the things we protected ourselves from. Lots of things go down in our lifetimes. Momma wouldn’t say is the name because a lot of people won’t speak on the outside, what is going on in the inside. Some kind of self preservation. Sometimes I think it’s still the old thought process that admitting a problem with your mental health is some kind of failure. There are still people that hold on to the notion that everyone says they have mental health problems these days. They say it like it is something we create for attention. I think we finally have given it a name for some of the feelings, coping, behaviours and reactions we have now.

If you have not gotten to a stage in your life where you can self reflect and decide how you are the way that you are, I hope you chose to do so. I am always telling my kids that, “ I think I have figured out a way to get through harder days, I just…” and the excuses flow out, which in itself is anxiety. When our reactions are second nature to us and they have always been that way, it’s harder for us to see them in ourselves. When life is good, it is easier to skate through. When life tilts a bit, that is when you may realize, you did diddly squat for yourself and have just been lulled into complacency. So how do you do when life is hard? Problem is, it could be years of good before the world, your world, tilts off of its axis!

Of course you don’t have to do anything! You may have a support network that could solidify water! It is amazing how poorly we treat ourselves. There are not enough pedicures, massages or facials to fix anything. Bandaids are not cures, they are pacifiers not getting to the root or the cure. So my hope for you is to not wait until you have to triage your life. Make sure you react to the start of the symptoms and get help. You need to start a course of action that get’s you on track for prevention!

You are cute, been cute forever! Everyone calls me cute, friends, my kids, all the time. I get other names too, I’ll take cute! I am a kid at heart, so cute it is.

Women wear many hats in the run of a day, sometimes you don’t know someone’s real heart until you spend an abundance of time with them. Or when you share some of their life changing moments. You don’t expose your real self right away to people. Or maybe reserve a little part of yourself for later to introduce. These might be your best parts or your parts that are not so pleasant! Sometimes we just are not ready to be the person we are!

I like real, honest and kind people. Rare, sadly. We are often pulled to people that we aspire to be like. Or maybe even have traits we need to work on. Sometimes it is none of those things! Human nature, like everything else is fluid. Can’t help but think of silly things like, I want to be like wine and age well. Time change has me overtired! Be yourself, be kind, change only if you want to! Be cute and always love!

I can’t even explain how easily how it all came back! The focus on a distant spot to get from point A to point B. We used to refer to ourselves as escalator people, just straight movement barely moving just flowing from space to space. Although now, I have become my husband and like Crocodile Dundee, talking to everyone, getting their story and engaging in conversations! I learned names and stories and first hand accounts of historical moments! I have laughed so much with people I barely knew. I felt no fear, truly an awesome adventure this week!

New York is iconic, that is the difference! Everywhere you look is related to a show or movie in your life. I was insanely excited at everything! I saw where Elf had his snowball fight, where Spider-Man broke up with his girlfriend, a scene from 27 Dresses, from Friends and Sex and the City! Some real sad things as well, 9\11, John Lennon’s assassination and many scandals involving actors and even the mob!! All of it was so riveting! I found the people willing to share, only a few aggressors! Even saw someone punch a car!

I will go back, the food, the people, the sights were beyond what I expected! I don’t know how many miles I put on my feet, but at one point we sat on a bench and questioned the pace we were trying to get all the things done. Can’t enjoy when you are spinning through! A cabby told us of a fare he had the day before that flew in and had 7 hours to see everything. He drove them around for a huge price, seeing all the supposed key sights, we took a minute and then took our time.

I will go back, without a vehicle, armed with subway knowledge and another list of things to see! Off season all the way! I do ❤️NY!

For all the people that take care of the unseen, they do it without recognition and are often not recognized. I don’t understand how much it takes for people to give credit where credit is due. Are we such a society that it would kill us to elevate someone else and all they give of themselves? People care for the dying, people work with the hurt, the abandoned, the suffering humans of the world. Maybe even just cook or clean for them, everyone has importance and is just as vital as the next person. If not them who? Why do people look down at others?

High horses, a lot of them. Why they consider themselves so superior to everyone else I don’t know! I personally feel it is jealousy. I think everyone has the ability to do anything they put their mind to. So why take the joy, the wind out of others sails? Be happy for others or take a page out of their book. Figure out what will really make you most happy , and really pursue it. Just because you don’t advocate for your deep needs or wants doesn’t mean you poo poo on others.

If you keep others at arms length, you will have no one when you reach out. There are enough horrors and loss in this world to deal with! Dividing people and turning away from others, leaves you empty handed. We need to celebrate each others victories, share in our successes! You will want the support of others in your lifetime, you will need it! Be a good human..

I am different! On self reflection and comparison over the past three years, this year is different. I don’t hyper focus like I did before. I’ve tried to decide if it is tied to the weather and I must admit, that still plays a major factor, that is not gone! It absolutely has to do with coping. I am not burying my head in the sand. My circle is the same size and I try to spread myself evenly without being too thin. I attempt to have something to look forward to every month. I certainly speak, which I find I had become silent the last few years. Not following my own advice! A lot of my compulsions are semi silent, and I even have let some things slide, that I wouldn’t before. Even though my lack of sleep still exists, I have actually slept more than I ever have in the past.

Is that the secret, more sleep? Am I putting on blinders to the doom and gloom and not dealing with reality? Maybe I am shrouding my heart to protect it from damage. Keeping away from the nay sayers? It all just may have been too big for me to even realize, something triggering negative emotions. I don’t know, but it has been good!

Peace is in my life. I try to avoid the foreboding feeling I get when things go well.. When anxiety sneaks up on me, and it does, I stuff it down until I can vent or talk it out with someone. That is a major part of my problem, I would save it all up for certain life lines in my circle, and I just don’t see them enough to get it out in manageable bits. More of a waterfall, and dominos. I have turned to hubby, he has been instrumental in this transition. We have always conquered the world separately together, but we are more of a team this year. I need to allow myself that, not get buried under all of it. I am taking a page out of my son’s life, borrowing his rose coloured glasses. Life is good!

Emergency rooms are on trial, seems everyone is a judge. The stories are quite shocking. Let’s look at ourselves for a moment, I mean everyone has something to say about the injustice and non debatable loss of life! What is your role in this? First, what is an emergency? ABC, airway, breathing, circulation…. in that order. If the airway is affected, if breathing is impaired and severe bleeding that needs immediate attention. These are emergencies! If you have a severed limb, been impaled, smacked your head and now can not stand or see, if you need to be sewn up, need a cast or have severe pain that keeps you from being upright…probably an emergency.

I also know, seeing a doctor, especially your own is now a two week process. After hour clinics are always busy, takes more than seventy redials to get through. The newest solution is the evisit, some know it as Maple. More recently the turn over with doctors retiring and taking off from the maritimes go to the big cities is a real issue! I have a family member with strep throat wait more than three days to be treated, it isn’t fun! Definitely not a trip to the emergency room. Getting meds, cold, flu, not a trip to the emergency room. Babies with fevers, diarrhea, puking, unless they are dehydrated, cough that affects breathing or a fast spreading rash… stay home. If you are in doubt, call tele care, they will advise you if you should go or not. You don’t want to help cripple the system. Can’t remember the last time I was to emergency for myself, may have been an X-ray pre Covid. Can’t get those at the doctor’s office.

During Momma days, I spent a lot of time there! My youngest had croup every winter and ended up there overnight until I learned to treat at home with a cold mist and puffers on hand when the temperature changed. Same child broke a bone a year, had pancreatitis, uveitis, keto acidosis more than once, Bell’s palsy and a car accident, should have had his own room there for all those stays. Believe me, I question no one, but myself. We have to be pretty untreatable to go sit in emerge. I don’t want to burden the system, and I sure want a functioning system if I need them! I can’t imagine showing up for something you know is beyond your control and are unable to be assisted. We have had some serious situations arise within our family and would hate to have delays. I wish I had the answer to fix this. So many of our systems are stretched thin, we are wearing down, surely something can be done.

I didn’t know my generation was called Generation X, I knew about Baby Boomers. I had heard my kids were Millennials, and just learned my grands are Alpha’s! This stuff is pretty interesting, and everyone has an opinion about the other generation. So I asked why is my grandkids generation called Alpha are they considered superior? I was told because they ran out of letters. We did generation X,Y, Z, so we switched to Alpha and the next will be Beta and so forth. Apparently Alpha’s are the most technological generation born the same time as facial recognition and Ipads. This is the generation completely born in the twenty first century. Admittedly this is the generation I feel old around. They know nothing of the Twin Towers, when you ask what their favourite show is, more often they reply with their favourite You Tuber instead. I also find when you ask them about what they want to be when they grow up, the answers are so broad. No more doctors, lawyers, nurses, teachers, instead some lean towards fame, marketing and internet based jobs. With no one yearning to service our generation, we could be doomed!

Our lovely generation is considered the most independent, probably because our baby boomer parents were working and we raised ourselves. Depending on the demographic baby boomers were also hippies! I felt my generation was rebellious, or maybe it was just me. One description of our generation, equated us with popping Prozac as the norm. Frankly it is all a little much. Stereotypes for everyone based on when you were born!

Like I said, I didn’t know I had a label. Generation X, kinda sounds like a generic prescription! I will not be joining this group. I am not much for brand names. I like what I like. I buy what I want, I am who I am. I promise you this, my great grand kids will not be inferior to the generation before them. When you are born does not disqualify you from any singular accomplishment nor should it have an expectation attached to it. Behold the unique person you are. Your past helps to design your future, you can’t really replicate that.

I had a dream about babies, so many babies, I couldn’t help all of them. There wasn’t enough of me, I couldn’t meet all the needs surrounding me. I don’t dream very much anymore. Seems this year, the dreams are coming back. Dreams are not all bad, they are where I can hear my dad’s voice again, I can visit my younger self, you can get a do over! Those dreams are harsh, there is always something going terribly wrong in those dreams and you have to go through all of it to the finish, but then part of your sleeping self says, “Not today!”and you get to change the dream and the outcome! Perhaps that is why when things start to go real wrong in life, we have to check and see if it’s a dream, or rather a nightmare. Also as you go through something awful it seems to slow down and it’s almost like you are looking at it from a third person. We can not change real life, there is not an option for a do over.

We can try for a second chance to change something, but there is no rewind. We did an opinion writing with the kids and someone choose that life was important. The next part of the assignment was to provide four examples with proof. Most kids chose dogs are better than cats or hockey is the best sport, they sound easier to me. The life child, then provided a list of all the things that make life important, like a really, really long list! There was a lot of editing, it wasn’t wrong though. The love of life was apparent, how can you fault that. For assignment purposes we had to weed out and narrow down until we had the most important. A child’s most important and our most important are vastly different. Sometimes it surprises me. I love that though! When a nine year old decides to have an opinion on something huge! I used to talk to my kids and now my grands about their views and opinions. Conversations that let them be equals. My grandson called me one day when he was maybe three, it was before Valentine’s Day because I remember asking him all about his cards for the event and who his crush was ( probably his teacher). I remember him asking for a sleep over and thinking it was odd his Mom would let him ask being a school night. We closed our conversation with all the love and we hung up. His mom called me a few minutes later and asked if he had called me? He had gotten her cell phone saw the icon for phone, seen my picture and made a call… they know stuff folks, earlier and earlier.

We need to channel into that curiosity, foster it, mould it, build it up before the world gets its hooks into them. All the other influences out there, you are their one and only first! Use that time, it’s the best time to solidify the relationship that carries you through the rest of their lives. Kids tell family first, you need to be their go to.As they get older conversations get harder. That’s when you will need to listen without reaction, some stuff is hard to hear without putting in your two cents worth. Start doing that every time, they just won’t tell you. Other kids will be the confident, and worse other kids will be the advisor, cute at five, not so much at thirteen. They will turn to friends over you at some point, it is part of the process, but the longer you are able to keep their attention, the better their moral compass will be. No one reaches adulthood without mistakes, and you do want your voice to be the one they hear when spreading their wings and the one they will miss when you are gone.