How many things are on the surfaces in your room? Too many? Can’t see one thing because there are so many things to see? Do you know where each thing came from? Was it a long time ago, or are you still buying things? Are you practical, things that are useful or just pretty things? My Gramma had a ton of ornaments, hummels on top of doilies, little dog figurines chained together, pretty things. I have friends that just chuck stuff, no attachments at all and talk about other friends that have their old report cards . I have my old report cards, oops, and my kids too!

I am an organization queen, for other people. Everything has a place, I can organize a space, easy peasy. It makes me happy to do so. If I could organize other people’s spaces, as a side gig, I would be a happy gal. It’s easier without attachment. Reader’s Digest books… you never know when you might need to know the plants that cure and how to live off the land. I whittle down, I store out of sight and don’t buy.

Whether you are creating space or downsizing you have to be fierce to get back square footage. There are lots of shows and ideas for helping through these hard bits. Donate, keep, sell is most popular… if left to someone else one day, it will be trash. Setting a timer to attack an area is a good plan, too easy to just move stuff around, it needs to leave, not relocate. Maybe it all just makes you happy, then leave it. If you want to move eighteen objects to dust one shelf, that is your business. It’s hurting nobody, it is your reminders of your life surrounding you, who can argue with that!

What can you attack in your life? Instead of ho hum, and moaning what can you do? It really does start with you. The hardest part is identifying what “it” is. Maybe there is a ton of things that weigh on you. The big picture is always overwhelming. It’s like cleaning a toddlers room. Everywhere you look is in disarray. Clothes, sippy cups, laundry, toys mixed with game pieces, puzzles, half eaten snack and maybe you might see the floor. It is in there, that is what you need to do, find the floor. Group like things together, and start on the piles. These layers can be overwhelming, but it is one piece at a time.

Just like writing a story in grade school, write out all your problems. Select one and brainstorm possible solutions. If you draw a blank, choose a different one. Just starting the page is half the battle. You might not complete it today, it will wait for you. There is nobody without problems. Somethings you can solve on your own, some you might need help, learn to ask for it. Getting them out of your head and on paper can shift the weight. Just like the piles of toys, moving everything in to like piles, organizing thoughts helps you make room in your head.

The non tangible problems, maybe it’s your child’s behaviour or your own, you are trying to work through, write them down too. You may not have a clue how to deal with some of these problems, they will require work. Talking to your mom friends, reading a book or trial and error. Not everything, nor everyone responds to traditional approaches. Heck I paid my kid a dollar a day to sleep in her own bed, she earned a Barbie and I earned my bed! Problems may not get solved, just dented, that is a start. It always starts with you, find the floor!

I’m not sure how folks are doing it nowadays. With rent and even mortgages upward towards two grand, the world is sucking them dry. The housing and rates have boosted through the roof. Living pay day to pay day trying to get by is ridiculous. Homelessness is abundant in every corner. It is sad, and even in a home, doesn’t mean you have it beat. House poor happens too, all the money going into paying bills and trying to exist. Staying out of the red can mean no extras at all.

People are afraid of a budget. Putting it on paper makes it real, but living in the dark is dangerous. If you go to your online banking right now and bring up the previous month from the first to the end, it’s there in black and white. Get a piece of paper and note all the regular withdrawals of what comes out automatic every month. That is what you need to exist. That isn’t even factoring the various things that you need to survive, like food and gas. I remember totalling groceries as they went in the cart, there was no extra. A hundred bucks buys squat, if you don’t have a surplus of items already, you are struggling. People are having to choose what they can live without.

Minimum wage was raised to 14.75 an hour, that is 1793.60 a month if you work a forty hour week and taxed twenty four percent. If your rent is over a grand… not leaving much for food, gas, bills or fun. They measure housing costs versus what you bring home to determine if you can get a mortgage. This gross debt ratio used to be thirty five percent, God love you if you qualify. They don’t factor that you have been paying 1600 a month for three years in rent and still managed to save a down payment. I don’t know what the answer is, get good at juggling? I looked it up, a circus clown makes forty thousand a year! Keep your balls in the air!

I have lost three uncles and an aunt just this year, it makes one ponder their own mortality. You look around at the survivors and remember other times. You remember the deceased attending their own parents funerals and realize you are the next generation. When the patriarchs and matriarchs of the family pass away you wonder who now will hold that family together. Who will be the one to share the stories of long ago with clarity. Which one has the recipes of the favourite meals and the secrets to life’s success. Siblings now cling together to lean and learn from. I have told my own kids the importance of that for when me and their dad are gone. They are lucky that way. The tally rises and it makes you uncomfortable that the older generation in your family is now disappearing.

Losing loved ones changes your outlook on life. Maybe not right away, but the impact makes you look at how you are living. How to increase your time or make use of the time you have left. How to pull the family together so none of the flock are alone. Covid crimped the visiting and be sure you get that back. Amp up all the family ties. Rebuild your family community and hold everyone near, days are numbered. If you were to put beans in a jar of all the days you think you have left, and take out a bean a day, the visual would have you scrambling to do everything you’ve always wanted to do.

Time passes and the families arrange themselves into their new niches. Leaders within edge up and hold the reigns for the others. The new older generation emerges, and a new generation is created. Families are fragile, they are breakable. Relationships should be held dear. Mending pieces of glass is hard, sometimes cracks remain. Do your best, cradle what you have. Keep it safe like the heirlooms they are. Live all your moments!

With two diabetic kids, you learn a lot about nutrition. Growing up it was meat, potatoes and a veggies. You eat carbs, your blood sugar spikes, you move the carbs burn off. Everything has carbs, I know, my kids count them, when they were young, I did. If there is a high fat content in the food, the carbs take longer. So losing weight, people reduce carbs and move more to get the desired results. This is not the case really. With all the crap they put in food, the balance is off. With the processed food, making life easier and the modifications for growing bigger and better a lot is lost.

Many people complain they are eating properly, reducing sweets and working out regularly but the weight doesn’t come off. Bodybuilders implement protein powders to build muscle, and what does that say about our food? Or our knowledge about it? Food is complicated. If you have a big plate of spaghetti and meatballs, you waddle off and have a nap. If you were to have the same amount of carbs in a lentil based meal, the calories are substantially lower. Fibre is missing in the modern diet. At one point during carb counting training it was suggested to subtract the fibre on the food label from the carb amount! Vegetables have no real carb value, fruit does, but it is real sugar. Well I hope it is, my son recently told me that the fruit this summer had less flavour although the fruit was bigger.

Half your plate should be fruit and veggies. Your fat and sugar should come from real food. Long gone are the days of Cream of Wheat and real oatmeal. Avocados nuts and humus home made, are better then the whipped up packages. Of course it comes down to time, but long life and more time given if you can implement the changes. Try a new journey this month, don’t wait for the new year, live to get old and healthy.

Me doth thinks too much, eh? Waiting on answers can drive you nuts! On hold on the phone, call backs, texts, new information. This instantaneous world isn’t as instant as we think. I should know that by now, and the, come what may attitude, tries to stay in the front. Breathe, one, two, three! Started watching TV again, to keep my mind occupied. There isn’t really much to ponder but if it’s in my head, I am dealing with it this week. Sometimes I think that I am not people ish, but I am. I think it’s the empathy that that gets me going. If you are my people, you know it.

I could make a career of going round the circle, checking in and praying for goodness, happiness, and that everyone has peace of mind. Maybe it’s a diversion from my own stuff, coping mechanism. Watch a movie and it gets all serious and sad and blurt out irrelevant things for distraction. Not a good trait for some occasions. Helps with the glass half full attitude. Why dwell?

Be positive, be happy, smile, all contagious. Rather share that! It helps with the broad scope and not wallowing. As I predicted, September is going to warm up in the next coming days, breathe it in! Does a body good! Right now it’s freezing and it smells like they have sprayed the fields with manure, I think I smell someone burning something, no doubt it is cold! Summer is wrapping up, less than a month, it was an odd one! Thankful season is coming! Get ready!

The moon has risen signalling the end to a great day. Our youngest just had another birthday, and this time it was more of an open house. With the varied schedules in our family, setting things in stone can not always work. Hubby and I wanted to host weekly dinners but even that is a bit to hard to accommodate everyone. For my son, it was perfect, the right amount of people varied within the day. Even had a pre visit and will have some more tomorrow. He was elated, messages and well wishes, were well received.

Being part of the medical community since he was three with diabetes and now blindness, he has friends in all his corners. His eye doctor, refers to us as part of her team. He is warmly received and told he is a big deal in her office. He received a personal card from his dental office, with a note from each person in the office, it showed their appreciation of his ability to shine bright through the cards he has been dealt. The parade of friends and family coming through today had his heart overflowing with happiness.

In his new life of darkness, having people around really brings him to life. I can’t imagine the disconnect he must feel without vision. Without people to hear, he really is alone. He is now everyone’s cheerleader. He hears really well and is not shy to interject his words of encouragement for whomever may need it. He is so positive and the few times he has been really low, just about kills us. I wish everyday gives him as much joy he had today!

Most of life’s problems, errands and personal goals are all slammed into the week before school starts. Well that is how it feels sometimes. The lax , “come what may” attitude that starts off the summer is now a panicked pile drive of to do lists. One thing I know, if you take off the deadline, you can relax. I have had a few blips recently that have me off my game. I stopped the internal monologue of, “ seven more days.” This repetitive countdown. I like my no clocks, no calendars mantra, that I implement in June. If things are not done by d-day, the world does not end. Day one, back to school is not d-day.

If all the school supplies you have to buy are not bought, guess what? They go on sale the day after. My kids are grown and I still have school supplies. You probably have half the stuff from last year. Our prince and princesses don’t have to have all new. Show and tell on the first day in the school yard about all the lovely things they have is over rated. Not to mention, it usually rains. What is the invisible meter stick that we are teaching our kids to measure themselves against? You do know that some kids have nothing? When you go shopping, keep that in mind. Maybe spend that over the top amounts for little doll’s backpack and grab something for someone else.

I get it, I’ve done it, but if they have a fever now for high end… hope they get great jobs when they are grown. We need to teach the difference between needs and wants… and working for something. Waiting, that’s a good one, this instant gratification, it’s not good. Let them ask, make them earn, and learn to wait for the pay off. You know, like real life.

High school was divided into clicks when I was there. Not a very accepting crowd if you didn’t have your group. Girls were very catty, hanging with the boys was much more preferable. Even though we preach inclusive, there is a lot of divide still going on. You would think we could create an atmosphere that could omit this repeating generational flaw. Sense of belonging is needed to thrive. Even infants that are ignored or neglected can fail to thrive. I have never been uncomfortable being alone or the silence. For some it is like starvation. Teens are often insecure and it creates a world of divide.

The prefrontal cortex is part of the brain that takes you into your twenties before it develops. It is responsible for planning, emotions and impulse. So the teen years are plagued with bad decisions and emotional roller coasters. Leaving them to get to bed, do homework, and eat are still executive functions that need guidance. You still need to hold the goal post and really look out for their mental health, probably more than ever. Even the ones that have amazing grades and perfect behaviour, need check ins. Kids that are good could still be pulling out their hair trying to maintain or even excel. Failing in their own mindset could be causing a world of stress that is unhealthy. We need to help them achieve balance in all things.

The stigma that still exists in reaching out for mental health help needs to be removed. Mental health needs to be a priority and as common as going to get a bandaid in elementary school. There is no normal besides the one set in everyone’s mind. Health class should be curriculum and mental health a solid topic in the class. Kids feel alone and often have no clue that what they are going through is natural. My generation, parents kicked their kids out all the time or threatened with reform school. I had at least half a dozen friends that ran away or were living on their own at sixteen. You have no idea what people are living with, be the harbour, the nest. Not the judge or the jury. Help them navigate, help them fly.

We don’t talk about politics, but we do. Nobody wants to point their finger at the man. Hippie days are over and nobody stands up, so they stand for nothing. Now with the internet banned or censored, they control even more. Rich Man North of Richmond has taken over south of the border. The song by Oliver Anthony is resonating with people everywhere, real, relatable, unfiltered. If you don’t know what I am talking about, give it a listen. We are sheep, following the jackass in the field, because we don’t think for ourselves. That is a fact about sheep. What does a quiet rebellious nation do? We look to others. The truck drivers attempted to stand for us, but some people can’t see beyond there own nose. The real story and the media portrayal were not the same, and some just swallow the medicine, not knowing the consequences or side effects. I used to be so political, when I first finished school. Age of adulting, learning about the state of the world, got me fired up. Now people don’t wanna hear it.

Bitch and moan into the abyss, people know stuff or they don’t but still have a point a view, valid or not. If you have done your research and have an unbiased opinion, it’s acceptable. People are so polar opposites on so many systems in place, common ground is about as close as civil war. I stood up for Kaepernick, when he kneeled during the anthem. People yelled, disrespect, but it wasn’t about that, it was police brutality at the time he represented. Rosa Parks went to the front of the bus and it was about equality and people shit their pants over the audacity of a black and oh my God … woman, standing for equality. Taxes were created to help with the war effort, they are still here.

So many systems under attack lately, health care, education, sexuality, sometimes I think we are going backwards. People need to figure out what to put on the front burner. Where do we say, no more, find unity!! Now they are the closet conversations, curb your words, filters on everything. What is real? We are suppose to work towards freedom. Covid was a glimpse at jail, blocks on so many things. Loss of freedom, like we didn’t know how to choose for ourselves. Putting drugs in our body, that hadn’t been studied or lose your job. The list goes on and everyone has their own lists and moral compass. Not suppose to say, Momma Wouldn’t Say is the blog. Sorry not sorry. End rant!