We used to heat our house with wood. There is no better feeling than wood heat! Love that cozy heat! Toasty in your soul warm! I miss it.

In our house now, when you smell wood, it means a project is getting done. Renovations being done are exciting! Whatever is being done always exceeds expectation’s! Hubby can move my ideas from plan to completion. Happy wife, happy life! Not the way I roll, but it sounds good!

The projects are endless around here. Our living space had been altered plenty over the years. I suppose once there is nothing left to do…well actually, I am not sure what that means. Still enjoy the surprises that new projects give!

I have pictures of our house from thirty years ago, love the progression over the years. House gets emptier, but we roll with the changes. The changes don’t stop at our house, my kids get to enjoy their father’s skills too!

I personally don’t get carpentry. I don’t understand the cutting something, away from the project, and it fits. He always explains it, but knows I need a picture to understand. That is fine by me, the end product is what I love!

Covid is in our community now. It is among many friends and family. So many people are divided in opinions, and that is totally fine. Everyone has a right to choose. I got vaxxed, it was never for me. I work with kids, no brainer that I would never want to be the reason others caught it. My mom is in her seventies. Two of my kids are diabetics, and one works with seniors.

I used to be terrified of needles, but as a kid, illness, was treated with a penicillin shot. I got tonsillitis all the time. I had them removed at five at Toronto sick kids. I also had terrible allergies and went for weekly allergy shots for a year.

Then fast forward to parenthood, one week before Christmas, both my kids ended up in the hospital with Juvenile Diabetes. One was three, the other ten. Needle fear went out the window, I could not even tell you how many needles I have administered over the years!

Now let’s look at the flu, sure for some the flu, no problem. Diabetics get the flu, they don’t eat. They don’t eat and sugar numbers plummet, not to mention fever makes sugar numbers rise… oh that is a real dilemma, times two. High sugar, give insulin, low sugar, give sugar. Flu season was always emergency season.

Now I am not sure about flu with all of you, but some flu is achy, icky. I have had flu that had me in bed with chills and a cough and fever that felt like ribs were breaking. Ever have a cough that made you piss yourself? Or how about the flu that had you on the toilet with a trash can in front of you? I’m sure Momma wouldn’t say, but flu isn’t always just a flu. Ever get a flu that leaves you dehydrated or leads to pneumonia or hospitalization?

So okay yes maybe a flu.
For my senior friends, Aunts, Uncles, Mom, for my Uncle with Cancer, not so simple. Just ease up on the flu comments. Flu for some is a death sentence.

December 21st, is winter solstice. We gain daylight. It’s comforting, hard to see it, but it is happening. I am sitting in my pj’s, checkered, fluffy, middle of the day, sipping coffee, happy. It is snappy cold outside, the sun is dead centre in the sky. I have no need or want to do anything. You don’t get many days like this. I will take it.

My son cleaned the kitchen, fed the pets. I slept in and it is lovely. This keeps up and I will be deemed lazy. I have had a lot of busy days, and I could choose to be busy, the list awaits, but not right now. A breather, is exactly what I need.

For those of you who do not get these days, they will come. It may not seem like it right now, but they do exist. Before New Years and Christmas, it felt like my feet never touched the ground. Full tilt everyday! I know busy days are ahead, there is plenty of things to fill the time.

I can easily get lost inside my head. Walking in fields of sunflowers, planning my next project and work details. Reminiscing all the good stuff that has and will happen. Maybe it’s all the sleep I have been getting! The autopilot is just shut off for a minute.

Just take a deep breath for a moment. Nice and slow, in through your nose, blow it out really slow, three times if you need it. Put your head back, let your muscles relax. Just take five, if that is all you can get, take it! You need this, take it.

What did you want from 2021? I don’t think resolutions should be made on the first day of the year. Goals should be ongoing, ever changing. Hope is what you need to face the future.

It is always good to have a plan, even if it’s just in the back of your mind. You don’t have to proclaim it to the world or write it down. Just know you plan on being here and doing good things. Being rigid, takes away your flexibility and ability to change. Believe me, you don’t want that. As we know the gut punches can leave us breathless. Adaptable will have to be our future.

We get what we get! You can make the most of what you get. Challenges don’t go away, there is no life without challenges. Your reactions to them are important. There are stop signs everywhere, caution signs, yield signs. These are just reminders that we are not always in control. It’s okay, to do things different.

What do you want from 2022? Deep inside your brain, you have answers. Maybe they are only partly formed, it will be fine. It is probably more important to know what you you don’t want, what you won’t allow. Keep it simple stupid… remember that saying? Nobody solves world problems in a day! You have your whole life, and you can’t predict how long that is, so focus on today. Come what may!

Holy! I am telling you, the spindles in my brain are firing overtime! The information floating around about variants and such are too much! I just want summer!

Time to just walk away from all the things that drag you down. I remember the start of 2021, it seemed the year held so much promise. It made me wary, like the year had too much pressure before it even began. I didn’t have much faith personally. Not sure why, but everyone was all about the coming year. Now, 2022, I am all in! I am one day at a time. If I wake up and all is well, that’s a win. Seems like every convo starter is how is everyone feeling. If I am feeling, that is a bonus! So onward and upward!

I have no more patience for all the stuff! I am not waiting for updates, my bubble are the ones from the beginning. Somehow I have added an extra year to all of this. I was discussing the Covid and added a year, but damn it seems like forever. Like I have said before, flu season had us quarantining before it was cool. We don’t mingle if we are sick, sick person is man down, we don’t leave our space. It’s a good motto!

Let us plow into 2022, chin up! Everything is unpredictable, that is not new! Do what you can! Do your best! That is all, that is it!

My daughter had a bear and her two cubs at the back of her property. We watched them from the back deck when they were around. The Mama was just eating and lumbering through the field. When the babies would saunter off she would do a quick check in and continue on. That’s what we do, eat and check in!

My mom, loves to take care of people. She doesn’t know how to be mean, angry or aggressive. She is passive and does all the mom things right.

I’ve known my mom the longest and I can tell you, she can be a Mama bear. When my mom gets mad, her eyes get bigger, her shoulders come back and she gets taller. Of course this is hindsight from a younger point of view, I haven’t seen her stormy in years.

The first time I can remember, I was maybe seven, we lived in a three story apartment building. There was a green space outside all of the kids played in. A new family had moved in and they had a sixteen year old visitor for the weekend. She didn’t seem to have much patience for us kids. She cornered me on the stairs alone. She grabbed me and held me against the wall threatening to throw me down the stairs. I got away and took off into our apartment. I got the information out in one sobby breath to my mild mannered mom. Just like Superman a transformation took place, she was out the door and on the stairs before the girl had barely gotten another step from our little episode.

Mom wasn’t much bigger than the girl, but her emotions were! The girl had an attitude, but mom made time stand still with a tirade of possible consequences for this steely teen. The teen got angry and my mother knew she had no more right to touch her, than the girl had to touch me. Mom didn’t flinch or back down, she barked orders at the girl and the fight left the girls face as mom then marched with her to the hosts of this young lady.

That is how Mama Bears are created. They reside in us and appear when needed. Just make sure that your Mama Bear is just. She should be used for only imminent danger! That is all she should surface for, the rest of the time just forage and eat!

Something about the lights at Christmas that bring a calmness. My tree lights have been on now for three days straight, day and night. I just have to enter the room and sit and stare at the tree and feel peace. I have opted for fake the last couple of years, so it is up much longer.

I don’t really know where my mind goes. I guess I just recall all the past. I remember being a little girl and coming out in the morning, the mystery of Christmas. I can recall my own kid’s voices, excited. I picture my dad and mom arriving early to watch the kids open their gifts. It’s all happy! Before we used to go and see friends trees. It was an event, plugging in your tree for others to see, a true transformation. Maybe it is the magical transformation that happens to most in the season. I am forever quoting the animated Grinch this time of year.

It is unexpected, even those you wouldn’t suspect. Magic is everywhere. Grown men whisper about not letting the cat see her present or it would ruin Christmas! I love it, this feeling that takes over, even if just for a day!

Wish we could bottle it, happiness, love, peace. Seeing the reflection of those twinkling lights in your loved ones eyes. Some of those eyes are older now, some are no longer with us. I like going back for a minute.

I am so happy I was able to be with my family this year, hubby, all three of my kid, my grands, my Momma! Hoping that I am able to see my extra’s this year too! Maybe they will plug in their tree! Merry Christmas and always love!

Don’t rush anything. Projects are good, goals are good, there doesn’t always have to be a deadline. Certain things demand one, if not, don’t. We are building a closet. Made the design, dimensions, materials and go. The frame is roughed, and the vision was started. Life of course happens and it is functional but incomplete. Now that time has passed, we can see the issues with some practical things. Bam! we can move forward with new and improved and when it’s done, it will be perfect!

Life is very much the same, having a big issue with change, apply this strategy as well. Take little bites, try it on for size, tweak it and move forward. For stubborn people like myself, it works. My husband will present ideas to me all the time, me being rigid, my go to is no. For one, I can’t see what he is saying, I need time to process. I tried a personal experiment where I automatically said yes first. It was really hard! It was life changing. It was uncomfortable. I was overbooked with things, but I did have a lot of fun.

I don’t recommend going from one extreme to the other, but finding balance is key. The world will not stop spinning because you can not predict the outcome. You can not control everything, that is one I have to drill into my head! The predictable life is not the name of the show! Life happens anyway. It ends the same for everyone.

Choose wisely, and don’t get discouraged if it doesn’t work out. There is no rule saying that you can’t change the plan. You are the driver of your own life. You hold the reigns, lean left, lean right, pull to stop. Maybe drop the reigns, put the pedal to the metal, hell pull the emergency break and swing er around!

Yup, that’s right, a cat. That is my blanket, I bet I never get that relaxed. Half stretched out, leg hanging off the edge, totally oblivious. What a life!

My dog has a great life, but always keyed into our energy. The cat don’t give a flying fig about anything. The phone rings, nothing, someone at the door, doesn’t move. She does whatever she wants, naps whenever she is tired. When she is vocal, people listen. If you don’t listen, she makes her presence known.

If something comes into the house she doesn’t care for, she puffs up her tail and goes to the highest point in the house and waits for it to leave.

She owns us, she runs the show. She gives affection as she sees fit. She hates the cold. Loves sunbeams! I could get behind that! There are no expectations. Food and water are always at your disposal and if not, you just bat someone in the head.

She always surprises us with her high energy even at her age! Always the best happiness noises. Our cat loves kids and dogs. She is patient, kind, likes to snuggle… yup a cat!

What can you do? Try as we might, things tend to be circular. When things do come full circle in a plot of a story it is almost predictable. It’s the plot twist that gets us. Didn’t see that coming, and you reveal in the mystery and surprise that smacks you in the face! In real life, annoying! Pisses me off actually. I tend to be orderly and a plan kinda girl. Previously my reaction is stick my head in the sand. More often lately is anger. I am done with plot twists.

The self guided life, the rebel, the girl that grew up to be fiercely independent is so done. It took a long to become me. I don’t like change. I don’t like regret, criticism, having my way controlled. Not sure how to put the fire out.

Live by example… hmmm. There is controversy at every turn. I turn off the news. I stop getting the paper, I block and delete. I stick to those I know. My circle is small, but the world keeps putting it’s nose in my life. Trying to block my happy!

I keep putting my best foot forward and someone keeps stepping on my damn feet! I will not turn off the switch anymore, I am back! I control me. I am responsible for me. Tired of standing back and watching people crumble. Tired of fear. Tired of all of it.

Need me, tell me. Reach out, don’t be alone. Don’t let this, whatever your “this” is take from you and yours! We have got this! We are stronger, taller, more resilient, this is our beginning!